She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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