Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
