We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I've blown a few things in my day
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
