I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
