TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
