how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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