she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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