thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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