i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
