Umm I'm too high to move.
Please, let me fuck your mom
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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