i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
