It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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