I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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