I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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