ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I just found a bag of teeth...
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
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