I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
