I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
whose parrot is this?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize