we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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