Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
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