Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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