I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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