i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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