Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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