i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
My breasts were aching with rage.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
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