come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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