Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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