He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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