What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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