BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
