he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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