Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
