ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize