All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
