so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
