we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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