idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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