it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Randomize