But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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