In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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