Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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