im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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