Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I have tasted many bathrooms
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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