Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
