we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize