Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
