Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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