how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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