After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
