mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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