its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize